The day your child turns eighteen, you lose something most parents don't realize you had: automatic legal authority. Under New York law, an eighteen-year-old is a legal adult, which means you can no longer access their medical records, speak to their doctor, or manage their finances without their own signed authorization, even if you're still paying the tuition bill.
Why this catches parents off guard
Every year, parents learn this the hard way when a college student is hospitalized after an accident or sudden illness and the hospital, bound by HIPAA privacy rules, won't discuss the student's condition or treatment with a parent on the phone. The same is true for financial matters: a bank, landlord, or the college's own bursar's office generally will not talk to a parent about an adult student's account without documented authority.
The documents that fix this
- Health care proxy and HIPAA authorization. A health care proxy executed under Public Health Law Article 29-C lets your child name you, or another trusted adult, to make medical decisions if they're unable to. A separate HIPAA authorization lets doctors and hospitals actually share information with you, which the proxy alone doesn't guarantee. Both should list you by name.
- Durable power of attorney. A statutory power of attorney under General Obligations Law Article 5, Title 15 lets you help manage a bank account, deal with a landlord, handle a lost financial aid check, or sign a lease renewal if your child is studying abroad, hospitalized, or simply unreachable.
What these documents don't do
A health care proxy and power of attorney don't give you control over your child's decisions while they're capable of making their own. They only activate for medical incapacity, in the case of the proxy, or, in the case of a power of attorney, once it takes effect, which can be immediately on signing or on a springing condition your child specifies. They're safety nets, not a return to parental authority. Most students are comfortable signing them once they understand it's about emergencies, not oversight.
Timing matters
These documents should be signed before your child leaves for school, not after a crisis. If your student is heading out of state, ask whether the school's health services or hospital network has a preferred proxy form, since some states have their own statutory language, but a validly executed New York proxy is generally recognized by health care providers as evidence of your child's wishes even outside New York.
This is a quick, low-cost piece of planning that spares families enormous stress during an already stressful moment. Learn more on our power of attorney guide and health care proxy page, or review our full estate planning services. Call +1 212 518 3868 or schedule a free consultation before move-in day.
